And so another eventless week goes by and i come back here to blog about it. So this has become an almost weekly blog huh. Well should be better than no updates at all, right?

So what has my eventless week been like. Like i blur i guess. I can barely think of anything that might seem worthy to mention. 

Well i have decided that friday is skirt day if i can help it. Might as well  make good use of the skirts i bought right. But other than that i guess there is a feel good factor in looking all nice and girly. So ya i have changed. The person who feels that wearing a skirt is bothersome is actually saying that wearing a skirt can bring some feel good factor. Well for the record i still feel it is somewhat bothersome.

Other than that, i have some really interesting revelation. I registered for ahmoi.com the other day out of curiosity and boredom. Well i guess in some sense ahmoi.com can be considered by many ppl as a site to get a girl or a guy for more special relationship or some might actually be really looking for friendship. For me i still dont see how this would work out. But i guess a penpal would do anyway. For me i like to keep people that i might meet on the internet at arms length. So e-mailing is all i am going to do. I am pretty skeptical about people that uses the internet to find friends. I might be too harsh in judging them this way and some might be very genuine in looking for friendship. But that might be a problem in its own. So why exactly did i register for ahmoi? To see what kind of interesting response i might get. Maybe you can call it ego boost. And to see what kind of people are they really that register themselves in there.

Which comes down to what kind of mail i get. In fact i got tons of mails. i think i have more than 100 response by now. And most mails just confirms what i thought in the first place. I would say 95% of the mails are from guys and out of all the mails i got, mostly just say hi wanna meet up or hi can i get your phone number so i can call you. Some even straight away ask if we could be bf-gf. Wow now tat is taking it abit too fast no? And some offered to bring me on a trip. Says alot doesnt it. Some actually ask if i would like to meet them up for some "fun". And some that mailed me are 30++. I might like my man older than me if i meet one but, i think some 30+ guy that go on the internet and look for a 21 year old girl to befriend..... well sounds a little dubious. And i noticed that engineers are a dime a dozen in there. i think almost 40% of the mails were from engineers or so they claim to be. So anyway i don't know about the rest of you out there but i wont be runnin out to meet anyone who i just know from the internet anytime soon. Call me a skeptic, but for every other genuine person out there, there are an equal amount of wierdos. And its so easy for them to prey on naive young things.

But all that aside i did response to some interesting mails. This mails are pretty witty so i guess just wanna see how witty are they. They might be cutting and pasting this msgs to everyone they mail but once you start mailing them i guess u'll be able to tell if they are really that witty. But other than that i wont be running out to meet them as well. So its a safe distance and its fine.

So here is the conclusion of half the analysis on people that look for friends on the internet. Just as i thought, the internet isnt exactly the best place to meet people. So wait for the second half of the analysis. We shall see how it goes.

So its half time update coz after that uneventful week this week seem to be rather eventful in the area of wheather that is. How ironic indeed..... for when people talk about the wheather is when they are trying to find a topic of conversation but finding none talks about the wheather.

 Anyway .... the wheather is going cuckoo. Or at least i feel it is, coz some one told me they were cloud seeding today. But anyway, there was a hail storm in subang jaya this evening. The first time in my life that i see a hail storm. I was actually at the back of my house when i noticed some odd white things jumping around on the floor till in a flash i realized what it was. ICE !!!! of course the clanging sound it made was obvious too. So i ran to the front of my house, and guess what. My whole garden was filling quick with small little round pieces of ice. Almost looks like it was snowing, only the white stuffs were more visibily roundish. But it didnt have enough to cover my entire garden to look completely white. Later the ice stopped falling and the rain was all that was left. Wonder if it will happen again 2morrow ha ha ha. Just hope no damage will be caused. Ha a really interesting phenomena that only a person who hasnt seen snow and only seen hail for the first time would understand. On the side note.... australia had a hail storm too and also it started snowing in another part of australia when it shouldnt be. After hearing that it just reminded me of the movie  "The Day After Tomorrow".

Well this post not being in order, it has been hazy lately. And today was the worst ever conditions i have ever seen since malaysia was hit with the haze thing some years ago. This really sux. I wake up and i look out the window and i wonder if i was still dreaming, coz it looked like how they make a dream look like in movie .. all blur and everything. Then when i was on my way to uni i look in the sky and i saw the sun disguised as a moon .... ha ah ha i said that coz it totally looked like an orange colored moon. It wasn't even bright enough to hurt the eyes when u look at it. And it disappeared under such a thick layer of smog that i couldnt find it anymore. And in the afernoon when the sun suppose to shine hot and bright,  i look outside and i see some sort of evening condition where everything is just dullish. Well at least one thing though.... the sun is not hurting the skin when it shines too brightly. But my head hurts coz of the smell and the smoke. I need to get out of malaysia now ....

And also, the most absurd thing that i saw the whole day was somthing which if isnt for the haze and all should look absolutely normal. When i was waiting for my fren to pick me up for lunch today, i was standing at the area where every one in monash and sunway who fags goes to fag. So thats a normal thing to see there... But just imagine the conditions of the haze was to a level which it was so bad that visibilty level was only less than a km and you see people puffing away on their ciggerates adding to the damn haze and you wonder what ridiculous scene is this. Well i did. It is just kinda unbelievable.

So there is my half time update .... Damn i am feeling hungry now .... but i shouldnt be snacking 

I'm sad....... i dunno if this sad feeling is due to me pmsing or if because of the pmsing that brings the sadness that was hiding before this to the surface.

What's real, what's not? And if what's isnt real can be brought to reality can what is real be made to become unreal.

feeling tired ..... shall go to sleep  

- i hate it when i need to talk to someone and no one is around for me        to talk to

- i hate it when i feel lonely eventhough i am sorruonded by people

- i hate it when i want to go online to find some comfort and the damn                 streamyx goes cuckoo

 - i hate not knowing if i am overreacting or under-reacting to certain             situations and in the end just being wrong

- i hate feeling helpless even when i know the answer to the problem

- i hate it when i find out the guy that i like used to like me and that my       gut feeling was right but it still never happened

- i hate having that wtf feeling about something but then me being me,       finding   a reason to justify the situation but still having trouble                   swallowing that fact

- i hate feeling disappointed

- i hate living each day thinking that i am happy only to be hit with the          blues one day and because of that question myself if during those            happy days i was genuinely happy all the time.

- i hate it when i have so many commitments but i can't meet all of them

Damn i really need someone to talk to now but there isnt anyone here that i would particularly like to share my insecurities with at the moment.  

Wow you wont believe how F**king hard it was to find a listener when you need one so bloody bad. So i finally talked to someone about some shit that got me bugged and even if it didnt change anything i at least feel a little less alone. Anyway it is no ones fault that i can't find anyone to talk to when i needed to. But wow my luck is pretty shitty to be feeling so shitty at such a very wrong time.

I need to start counting my blessings all over again .... i lost count after the numerously huge amount of distraction that set a mile high wall obstructing any possible view of all the good stuffs that i should be happy for.  And i still havent got around that damn wall yet. So now all i am seeing is wall, wall, wall. Anyone interested in helping me blast that damn wall to smitterins? At least give me one little thing to be happy about, though by the sound of it i am not so depressed that i cant get off my bed. 

Anyway, a little irrelevant this news. Or maybe it might be my mini source of happiness... but i shouldnt count my chicks b4 it hatches or something like that. But some one who is back fr aussie who supposingly was to find work in kl but went back to s'pore instead will be heading here maybe next week.  He says he will give me a call when he is here. He needs to get out of s'pore every 2 weeks. And instead of circling johor he decides to come down to kl to visit his frens. So ya thats it.

long time no post. Got lazy again lo.

Anyway went and see The cave with jerm, cindy and munis. Remind me next time if the title of the show involves something that starts with "The" and the next word is something dark, boring and just sits there, don't ever go watch it . Think The Hole, The tunnel, The Rock ? ke ke ke.  Hmmmm i almost wanted to sleep liao in the cinema. Ah well nothing to shout about la. I want to watch charlie and the chocolate factory though.....but no teman .... and the other one today probably going to see with his friends lo 

Went out to yam cha at 2 places after that, gazebo and nasi kandar. Took some whacky pics on the way and in gazebo. And heard some interesting stories when in nasi kandar. Ha ha ha, so when sometimes i seem to know about "stuffs", its just that i happen to chance upon someone who was willing to share their experience. I am not really that experienced after all.  I dunno why, but people that do things that they know would be dangerous and wrong do fascinate me. But i am only fascinated by those that knows their limit( well its either that or they were just plain lucky that nothing bad happened) and in the end repented and mend their ways.So now i learn a little more about drugs and all.  And heard what stupid things they did. Its pretty interesting that this things arent something you just hear about or read about on the news or some article anymore. But at the same time its quite freaky how close to home it is. I can't decide if i am fascinated or freaked.

The following part might not make sense to the uninitiated so ignore it if u dont understand. 

I wonder how many times do i need to chant " take things easy" for it to take effect. If i decide not to care then i will completely just dont give a damn anymore. And thats the part i am afraid of. So many maybes. Maybe there is a chance, maybe i am just imagining things. Ha ha ha i can see how stupid i am sounding but that still doesnt stop me from being stupid. So this is how it is huh? one of those i know i shouldnt be doing this but i can't help it situations. And it is happening to me.